Sleepy mornings and stressful evenings.

 Yesterday I had two young patients. Kids aged 8-9. The first one I had already worked on so he was more or less comfortable with everything already. Had not used LA before however, so that was a challenge for him but he did well. The challenge for us was isolation since apparently kids salivate like there's no tomorrow. The second patient really had me drained. It was her first ever appointment after the initial diagnosis and she wasn't ready at all. I had to pull out all the tricks I knew just to numb her up. After that, she became a good girl more or less but the tooth in question started giving me a hard time. These deciduous molars can be a tricky, especially if you're not used to dealing with them very often. Unroofed the pulp chamber to a profusely inflamed pulp that just wouldn't stop bleeding. Was almost convinced I had perforated through at a point but thankfully that just turned out to be pulpal remnants that just don't want to succumb to your instrumentation. Found a second distal canal. Dressed and breathed a sigh of relief. 

Was just about done in every way possible when I was asked to do an extraction. A simple one but the medical history and physical condition of the patient (and myself) threw me off and I was reluctant. The receptionist didn't help either. Dr. S did, however. She'd been checking the patient and going back and forth between us. Made me realize that it was all in my head. Brain fog and whatnot. The procedure was clinical. I was surprised at how easily I'd let circumstances deceive me and cloud my judgement. I'd almost bombed like Mrs. Maisel. 

Have the retreatment case today of the lady from London who says her NHS dentist told her there were blockages in both her canals and had referred her to an endodontist who she couldn't afford. I had achieved patency in the first appointment but hadn't let me do the pre or post endo buildup like I'd wanted to I'm not sure how sealed it's been and whether the sinus tract has started healing up or not. 

I don't know why this post is all dentistry. Maybe because it's a coping mechanism when you don't want to think about things you have no control over. Or things that are entirely impossible in real life but the scenarios are just so good and the ideas so real in your head that you keep replaying them again and again. Trying to find a way around those concrete obstacles that you know are there for a reason but the heart wants what it wants, right? Ultimately though, you know you've got to shut it down. Shut it all down. Not look for two laughs in the price of one. It is what it is.